Category Archives: Books

She sits alone

I wrote this a lifetime ago and thought it was time it saw the light of day.

“She sits alone, waiting for the sun to rise. Although it’s just another day to her. Same chores to fulfil, same mouths to feed, same hazards to avoid, same dreams of freedom. It’s not that she hasn’t tried to find freedom. She has tried to escape several times. And she’s come close a few times too. But the same thing pulls her back and stops her every time. She can’t leave her children. The only thing she has that makes this life worth living. The only thing that can make a smile appear in her eyes as well as her mouth. Because she has to smile. All the time. No matter who is there. Because how can she not be happy? She has a beautiful home, a hard-working handsome man to support her. She doesn’t need to work, just stay home and look after her adorable children. What more could a woman want?

But what the world can’t see, and she can’t tell them, is that her beautiful home is a prison. Just because there are no bars on the windows doesn’t mean that she’s not a prisoner. She’s free to come and go any time she wants – as long as he approves. She can paint the walls whatever colour she wants, fill the house with whatever furniture and trinkets his money can buy, but it doesn’t make it a home.

And her wonderful, hard-working husband? The life and soul of the party, always polite and funny in company. Always holding her hand in public, laughing and joking with everyone. But all animals know how to play the game. Mother Nature was good that way, and made sure that even the most evil of animals can look cute and cuddly, harmless even, when it really needs to.

Because an animal is what he is. Because no human would treat another like this. No human would defile another in the way that he defiles his wife. No human would destroy the soul of another as he has hers. No human would take the heart of another and drain all of the love and happiness from it has he has to hers.

But these are things that the world cannot see. They see the loving husband, the doting father, the lucky woman who has all she needs and more. And this is the lie that she’ll continue to live until the time is right, until she has built up the confidence, the nerve, the courage to walk away. To tell him no more. No more will she succumb to his demands, to his disgusting wants and needs, to his “conjugal” rights. No more will she watch him walk out the door knowing who he’s going to meet. No more will she listen to his lies and broken promises. No more will she lie to doctors and hospitals. No more will she lie to her parents. And no more will she cry herself to sleep night after night, only to rise with a smile and a spring in her step because that’s what is expected of her.

But until that day she will sit, each and every morning, alone. Waiting for the sun to rise on another day.
Because, as a mother, she must.”

TTB xx



Filed under Books, Life and Me

Odd Thomas

I’m a great believer in reading books whether they are biographies, autobiographies, historical, or novels. They are a great way to self-educate or even just lose yourself in another little world for a few hours a day.

I’m currently re-reading Dean Koontz’s books featuring Odd Thomas (if you haven’t read these, give them a go – the man is a literary genius!).

Anyway – the point of this is not to send Dean’s sales through the roof, but to share some quotes from Odd Thomas himself:

I’m not religious, but this makes complete sense in my mind:
“You can con God and get away with it, Granny said, if you do so with charm and wit. If you live your life with imagination and verve, God will play along just to see what outrageously entertaining thing you will do next!”

So true:
“Most people tend to think the best of those who are blessed with beauty; we have difficulty imagining that physical perfection can conceal twisted emotions or a damaged mind.”

And my personal favourite 😉

“From time to time, I do consider that I might be mad. Like any self-respecting lunatic, however, I am always quick to dismiss any doubts about my sanity!”

If you haven’t read Odd Thomas – I recommend you do!


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Filed under Books